How the Godly Man Pursues

Hey guys! Welcome back to my blog!

Sadly, this will be my last blog post until end of December because I will be doing my final nursing preceptorship in labour and delivery, which I’m so pumped for! I have about 3 more months until I complete my 4 year Bachelors in nursing degree and I honestly cannot wait to be done and working.

On another note, I wanted to create a video which is sequential to my previously uploaded one titled Single, but not desperate. Here I am speaking on how to identify the pursuit of a kingdom man. If this man does not have these qualities & characteristics then watch out! You may not want to lead him on or invest in a relationship with him. Of course every relationship is different and unique and my opinions shared in this video are not absolute, but they are wisdom in my eyes and perhaps you may agree or not agree or stand in between with what I have to say. Also, for the men who stumble upon this video, do not fret! In a nutshell, if you have an active relationship with Christ then you will most likely fall well into the 3 categories I discuss in it. Now wipe that sweat off and enjoy the video 🙂

Like always like and comment below! did you learn something? Did something offend you? Agree or disagree? Lets start a discussion 🙂

Love you guys regardless ❤

Ladies: Here Are 5 Things a Man Needs Before a Woman  

All content for this post is taken from Dr. Myles Monroe’s preaching of “the 5 characteristics of an ideal man”

Let’s just jump right into it!

http://strugglincatholic.com

A bible study was done where Adam, the first male human created, was the focus of the study. Why was Adam chosen as the center of this study? Simply because God created him with specific instructions to fulfill before later deciding that it was not good for Adam to be alone, resulting in the creation of Eve. God created Adam to have dominion over the earth, the seas and all walks of life. He wanted Adam to enjoy his time in Eden, the protective environment formed for him. Eden cannot be found on a map today, it was never an actual location, instead it represented an environment. Better yet, Eden was the presence of God. Before sin entered earth, Eden signified the union between God and Man, and it was a beautiful place to be.

  1. Therefore, first thing God gave man was his presence. So the first thing a man needs isn’t a woman, it is Eden, or the presence of God. A woman should meet a man in the presence of God.

TIP: Ladies don’t try and drag a man back to Eden, meet the man there! 🙂

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    Genesis 2:15 God commanded Adam to work… Yes ladies God’s priorities are VERY CLEAR, he requires the man to work. Not only a job to provide for the family but also being aware of or moving towards a vision. Preferably he should be opting to fulfill his purpose on earth otherwise he can get confused very easily, following any path that leads him to anywhere. The best form of grounding himself would be in Eden and in the word, this way he can receive divine direction.

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    Genesis 2:16 God said to Adam that he should be the cultivator meaning he should bring out the best in everything around him, maximize its potential and produce fruit. He requires the man to fulfill his purpose in the world. The best example of a real man is Christ. Believe it or not, he has a wife as well. Christ is married to a beautiful diverse woman and her name is The Church. He tells men to do what he has done to his wife which is to Love their wife like he loves his own. Wash her with the word of God, raise her with encouragement, help her to be less insecure and enable her to reach her fullest potential as well. Then he is free to present her back to himself.

4. God commanded Adam to Guard the Garden. The male is designed to be the protector. He has not been given a stronger and larger frame to abuse the woman or family; he has been made that way to protect her and his family.

5. journal writingGenesis 2:17 The last thing God gave Adam was his word. God never spoke directly to the woman to inform her about the tree of good and evil. He never told her not to eat from its fruit but he did tell the man. Since the man received the word of God, his job was to teach it to his wife. It seems often in this day and age that the woman knows more word than the man. A man should know the word before meeting a woman.

Genesis 2:18 Then God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” The man God is referring to is a man who is in Eden, Working, Cultivating, Protecting and has the word, that man can now receive his Eve.

         If the man does not experience the presence of God, isn’t working, does not cultivate, refuses to protect and does not have the word, It is good for that man to be alone.

Thank you for joining me for this weeks blog post! Tell me in the comments down below whether this post resonated with you or was against your own beliefs. Feel free to comment your thoughts, ideas, like the post and subscribe for future entries. 🙂 Till then stay safe and blessed ❤

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S -E- X: Oh, So Keeping Yourself for Marriage isn’t wrong??? + 3 Ways this can be achieved

Just a disclaimer, my views on this topic will be heavily fueled by my religious affiliation to Christianity. This means that I will be referencing the bible often so if you got a problem with it, feel free to skedaddle. Also if you are one of the Kenyan papa’s, mama’s or elders who feel that this topic is ‘improper’ feel free to talk to me afterwards but leave your fimbo’s and slippers at home (its winter anyways).

The idea of sex, at least in my household, is often an unspoken, forbidden topic to address. The unfortunate thing about it is that sex, in a lustful manner, is hyper-advertised everywhere in our society. If you don’t learn about how sex is defined in the bible, then the world will gladly teach you their understanding of it. Our hyper-sexualized environment sends out a message of lust; that sex in nature is about immediate gratification with little discernment. As I mention this, you may be playing out a steamy scene from a recent movie or T.V. show you watched where a man whisked a woman away from the club, back to his apartment after their first encounter only to end up waking up tangled in bed sheets with no further objectives. These kinds of encounters are common in cinema but often leaves a void of unhappiness and unfulfillment because honestly, it’s a really shallow way of relating to others. This is not the way God designed how sex and marriage should look like.

My objective for this post is to write on why it is ok to keep yourself pure or celibate in honour of marriage and 3 ways on how this can be achieved.

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Why wait or hold off from sex until marriage?

As youths and young adults we are introduced to the concept of sex early.  However, your understanding of it may not be aligned with its original intent, which is best derived from God himself because duh, he’s the all-knowing creator of it. As twisted as it has become, sex is honestly a great thing absent of sin when done right. Hold onto your seats I’m about to preach! The bible defines sex or the idea of sex as a man leaving his parents and uniting himself to his WIFE (note it doesn’t say girlfriend or side chick, it says wife; get her a ring and issa wife). The world of course portrays sex as a regular activity which everyone participates in with no harm to it. The truth is there may not be any immediate consequences (if you’re lucky) but there may be emotional and psychological damage during the process.

You will end up giving a piece of yourself to the individual you are being intimate with whether you know It or not. You are at your most vulnerable during sex because it is an act of trust with some level of expectations or feelings of entitlement afterwards. For example, you could feel entitled to loyalty from the person you sleep with but that person won’t act loyal since they don’t have a reason for it. Marriage binds 2 people together with a promise. God intended thorough commitment and respect to underlie the purpose of marriage, this way your emotions, psychological, and physical health stay intact and protected.

1 Thessalonians 4:3-5 states that it is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control your own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the pagans, who do not know God. Since you are the child of the most-high God, made in his own image and crafted in his likeness, you are also expected to know him through having a relationship with him. You no longer belong to yourself, you are bought with the precious blood of Christ so you are encouraged to abide in his will which is set out only to benefit you. Imagine, your faithful God wouldn’t just stop at sacrificing his beloved son to help you enter heaven but also to give you the option to follow him, choose life, protect yourself and achieve success as you power through life. It is truly a selfless amazing act isn’t it?

Even if you are not a Christian, the principle of abstaining from sex until marriage has more benefits than not. The reasons outlined above still apply to you if you want to protect yourself from the consequences that arise from sex before marriage. In addition, abstinence helps lower the risks of contracting an STI and helps you focus more on the person’s qualities and things like whether or not they’re actually a good fit for you.

Lastly, please do not beat yourself up if you are no longer pure. This is not a post on condemnation. The bible says in 1 John 1:9 if we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. We are not our mistakes or even our past choices, if you know better you do better. God actually considers you ‘pure’ through the light of Jesus Christ so you dont have to carry that burden any further from here on out. In fact, your sins were forgiven before you were even born! Live life now like you are living for Christ, its the only way you can walk guilt free and still enjoy the pleasures of life within the structure God designed for it! ❤

If you seek more encouragement with celibacy, click here to Devon Franklin and Meagan Good’s testimony on why they chose marriage before sex while working in Hollywood.

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If you are young and interested in dating but want to save yourself for marriage, here are 3 ways to prevent falling into the temptation of sex before saying “I do.”

  1. Know the difference between someone who respects your decision and someone who doesn’t

I think the best way to say this is to just be equally yoked in a relationship, this way you already have similar foundations and values and can understand each others requirements better. Your partner should be able to respect you and vice versa for wanting to save yourself for marriage. Ladies, a guy who respects your decision shows it by asking how he can be the most helpful in this regard, and encourage you to let him know if he is crossing any lines or making things difficult for you. He will also accept your explanation without further questioning or making you feel guilty/pressured about it. Be with someone who encourages you to be who you are, stand by what you believe in and optimally loves God as much if not more than you do! (Kudos to those of you who are with a partner like this already, may God direct and bless your paths). If that person does not respect or encourage your decision, it is better for them to be alone 🙂

Click here for the link to 5 things man needs before woman by the one and only Dr. Myles Munroe (mind blowing)

  1. Have confidence in stating your boundaries

Don’t wait until you are in a horizontal position to inform your partner about your boundaries and expectations. Instead, if you are serious about entering into a relationship with someone, you need to express your beliefs on sex, intimacy and marriage as soon as possible (first 3 dates if possible). Remember that you are dating with intention, not just for fun and short lived pleasure. Do not be ashamed to talk about your faith either, some people are Christians but are ashamed of losing their partner because of their belief in Christ. Matthew 10:32-33 states ‘So everyone who acknowledges me before men, I also will acknowledge before my Father who is in heaven, but whoever denies me before men, I also will deny before my Father who is in heaven.’ I dont know about you but I would much rather be acknowledged by Jesus than a person. Now whether you are a man or woman, part of defining the relationship is being clear about your expectations, that way you give them the freedom to walk away and not feel like their time was wasted. Having someone who waits till it is too late or changes their minds about a relationship later is really frustrating. It’s better to get a clear understanding from the beginning so you dont feel played, used, or that your time was wasted! trust me I’ve been in a situation like this in a platonic relationship and its the last time I will let someone take advantage of my precious time.

  1. Find appropriate ways to show your partner that you love them

Love isn’t just summed up in sex, there are so many other ways to show your love to your partner. For example, you could cancel something in your schedule that you value to make room to see them, this can make your partner feel  important in your life. You could also give them words of affirmation and show real support for them in their choices. You could lend a hand and offer your time or understanding of something to benefit them so they feel appreciated. There are different love languages that people respond to. Figuring out what love language your partner speaks helps veer the relationship away from sex and more towards investing and growing each other. This goes both ways, it’s a mutual relationship so both parties should feel appreciated otherwise there would need to be some changes made in order to enhance the health of the relationship. So be creative and find ways to please your partner making them feel lucky to have you.  

 

Thank you for reading this weeks blog post! Feel free to comment your thoughts down below on how it made you feel? Are you more confident now approaching this topic and has it encouraged you to define the relationship before getting too deep into it? Come back next week where my new suggested topic will be on betrayal and forgiveness. I apologize for not posting every Wednesday as I would have liked to originally. It’s harder than I thought and I recognize that a group of you check my blog on Wednesdays for a new post. I will try my best to post once a week but I cant promise that it will be on one day. Therefore if you just subscribe, you will be notified of new posts when they arrive instead of expecting it on one particular day. Either way, Thank you for your commitment to my blog. I love you guys and God bless!